I am just realizing that I’m struggling a bit this week. Friday was a little bit higher calorie day (a little over 1400) because we went to Chili’s after the Weight Watchers meeting and I ate a little more than usual. That was fine, but I only had about 100 calories deficit for the day because all I really did activity-wise was use the rower for 20 minutes. I was going to use it for 45 minutes, but I noticed my left was hurting and I’m only supposed to use if it if the knee doesn’t hurt.
All of which made Saturday a very sedentary day. Fitbit said I burned only 1386 calories. That shows how few calories someone my age and weight can burn if I’m not doing much except sitting around. Using a walker without bearing weight on my left leg doesn’t lead to me burning many calories, particularly if I’m not able to use the rower. I decided to take off from the rower until my knee doesn’t hurt any more.
Saturday I didn’t even have a calorie deficit. Usually we go out for lunch on either Saturday or Sunday, but it is hard to do using the walker since the hopping is just exhausting and it’s hard to maneuver the walker in a lot of restaurants anyway. So, I sent my husband out to get Subway. I haven’t eaten there in since early February. I did eat higher calorie than usual, partly because I was feeling sorry for myself. It wasn’t horrible my total calories for the day were still under 1500 calories. But, burning so few calories, Fitbit says I ate 80 calories more than I burned for the day.
All of which was really depressing. Before, if I was eating 1400 and something calories on a weekend day, it wasn’t stellar, but it was still a calorie deficit. Now, it may not be.
Sunday was a little better. I still could feel my knee bothering me some so I didn’t use the rower. I did get in a little activity by doing upper body strength training. Fitbit says I got my calorie burn up to 1458. Had I not done the upper body work I would have only burned 1400 calories or so. I did eat less today so I had a 337 calorie deficit.
On top of everything else, I realized in the evening that I seem to be starting to come down with the sore throat that my son had all week. My head was really hurting and I was coughing and just generally aching all over. None of which makes me happy.
I’m just not feeling in a good place right now. I hate, hate, hate the just sitting around all the time. Doing the rower for 45 minutes or so a day was the one thing that was helping. Now, I have to wait until my knee feels better. And, once it does feel better, if rowing causes it to hurt again then I may have to cross rowing off my exercise list which won’t make me happy either.
Monday I go to my first physical therapy appointment. I have mixed feelings about it. I want to do exercises to help maintain (and maybe gain) strength in my leg. But, I know I’m very limited in what I can do. The doctor’s office said it would be all non-weight bearing, range of motion stuff. Things like leg raises and quad sets. Also, I’m dreading going to the physical therapy office. It is on the 2nd floor of a building (there is an elevator) and even with my husband dropping me off at the front of the building, I will have to do a lot of exhausting hopping to get from where I’m dropped off up to the office. I know it sounds ridiculous to talk about using a walker being hard, but I am not supposed to bear weight at all, so I basically I am just hopping on my right leg. That gets very tiring and unpleasant really fast. At first, it seems fine but once I’ve walked hopped about 30 or 40 steps, it is very hard to do. I actually put on a heart rate monitor one day while doing it and surprised to see my heart rate getting up into an aerobic zone. I wouldn’t actually mind that part, but the hopping on the one leg is very jarring to the body. I just dread the walking from the building to the PT office and then later the walking back outside.
I recognized today that I was in danger of going off track. A part of me just wanted to bury myself in food that would make me feel better. I did manage to stay on track and ended up having a good day in terms of what I ate. But, I know that I’m just frustrated and depressed by how this leg injury is playing havoc with my calorie deficit. I know that I have to recognize that if I don’t have much of a loss (or any loss) for the next 3 weeks, it is no big deal just so long as I don’t go off track and have a large gain. But, it is still a struggle. I feel like I’m doing so much work to watch what I’m eating during this time, but I don’t have much chance of seeing much success at the scale given how few calories I’m burning. And, yes, I know that this is a time when I shouldn’t really be focused on the scale. It’s still hard.